Okay, maybe its not hopeless. But after much *ahem* encouragement from sarachan, I am reminded that my blogging is hopelessly delinquent. And I’d blame lack of good ideas, lack of time, lack of sleep, or perhaps too much to do, too much this or that. But that’s really not the problem. I selfishly want you to think I’m a better person than I am, so me not blogging makes you really think nothing of me, which is confusingly sometimes better than something of me.
That confusing paragraph aside, its been a long time since life has been noted online. Last time I blogged was way back before fall semester. oh, where do I begin...
when everything falls apart
your arms hold me together
when everything falls apart
your the only hope for this heart
when everything falls apart
and my strength is gone
i find you mighty and strong
you keep holding on
you keep holding on
-fee
I’m not dead yet
My M.Div degree at Biola/Talbot, seems to be shouting this phrase [I’m not dead yet] as a war cry. Its been a tough battle, and I’m not sure that anything else beyond grace allowed me to pass all my classes [and still keep a 3.8 gpa!] this semester while working. 8 units plus a zero unit class, plus work, plus ministry.. and it’s just been plain busy. Perhaps it was good, but I must admit that January [my month off] is by far my favorite so far. Its been a good time to reflect and think about the future of where I might find myself in ministry to others.
I admit it has been hard to find good preparation for ministry at talbot. I think overall there have been good things over the past year and a half. I don’t want to discount it entirely as some might. But to be certain the purpose that I had in pursing this degree has been lost a bit in the mud of what the school is actually about. So that aside, if that made no sense please skip to the next paragraph and forget my rambling.
Your car’s roof has such shiny lights on it, Officer
Those words have yet to escape my lips, but even as I drove home tonight [driving a christian 2-3 miles over the speed limit, at most] I found myself being followed by a faithful officer of the law ready and able to grant my new Mazda3 hatchback a speeding ticket. Its been an issue of some time that my civic is getting to the age to go out to pasture. And what better christmas present to me, than a new car? See, I knew you thought the same way I did! Yea, I admit it was a bit more than I probably needed, but it was used and at a good price. And it will faithfully, keep me at the speed limit, and driving down the road for many years to come. Lets hope the extra 80 horsepower of engine [vs my civic] doesn’t produce gross amounts of sin.
Let every person be subject to the governing authorities. For there is no authority except from God, and those that exist have been instituted by God. - Rom. 13:1
Counting up a few costs
I’ve been watching the skies
They’ve been turning blood red
Not a doubt in my mind anymore
There’s a storm up ahead
Hello Hurricane
You’re not enough
-switchfoot
It’s easy to say that the future will be busy. Or even that it will be gloomy. But it seems that the work ahead, both in school, ministry and work, are all hard roads ahead. I anxiously await the challenges of this next semester. It think that God will provide growth for my soul, and provide me with practical lessons in my faith during this time. But right now it feels like sitting on the porch of my house in florida [back when I was 10] and waiting for Hurricane Andrew to roll in. Too much to think about; almost distracts me from the chaos that is about to hit.
And its going to be a great semester. I’m looking forward to getting the gospel into an otherwise dark community here in orange county. God willing more will follow on this. right now, pray that God would open up doors for ministry.
I wanna be your hands and feet
I wanna be your voice every time I speak
I wanna run to the ones in need, in the name of Jesus
I wanna give my life away, all for your kingdom’s sake
Shine a light in the darkest place, in the name of Jesus
In the name of Jesus
-fee
Christmas Isn’t christmas without chaos, or birthday cake
I mean really now. Its always chaotic. Even the year of Christ’s birth there was no room in the inn. Just too much going on, if you ask me. No but really, it was a busy christmas. Between a hundred [yea, 100] person choir, and finals and final projects... it was a busy few weeks. Stack on that my dad being back in town from China, my grandmother moving to a different retirement home, and plenty of the usual christmas decoration traditions, and you’ve got an awesome recipe for stress. It’s funny that whenever I’m really stressed out my right eye has a vein or something that pops, because I get a bloodshot eye for a good week. And strangely enough this year it didn’t happen till after christmas was over. Guess the end of the year was more stressful than Christmas. .. Who’da thought?
All that to say, it was a odd past few months. Sure there was chaos. But even Thanksgiving/My birthday [the same day this year] was odd. It was odd because my family was all sick, and the whole day basically entailed me picking up food for thanksgiving dinner, and then trying to help others back to health. Odd way to spend the holidays, and certainly not the stereotypical ‘thanksgiving dinner’ that everyone sees in the movies. It was funny though because my birthday cake actually got eaten for christmas [it was an ice cream cake, frozen in the freezer] and we got to eat it on Christmas day. I guess I just celebrated my birthday with Christ this year, instead of on thanksgiving. hey, it works, right...
Sleep affects the general ability of my brain to reason
I think its taken a few years to figure this one out. But here it goes: If you get more sleep, you’re less likely to be in a bad mood, and more likely to be more productive in the hours that you’re awake.
I know, crazy talk right? Caffeine all the way, right? Well this past semester I can proudly say that I survived without any all nighters. There were a couple close nights, where it got close, but I managed to plan somewhat well. that’s quite exciting. I think I’ll try to do it again this next semester.
And as a matter of fact, I’m going to go to bed right now. Perhaps you’ll hear some words from me in the next month before class starts back up? Perhaps you’ll hear of some exciting news in my life? Perhaps you’ll hear about some exciting new, something? Who knows... who knows.
night journal
-eric
